Being in love is not the same as loving someone. You are in love when you feel a rush and excitement being with your partner. In order to love someone all you need is to choose to love. As such you can choose to love even those that hurt you and let you down. You may even be in love with that person who is breaking your heart. The question then is whether love alone is enough to perpetuate a meaningful and fulfilling relationship. To remain in a bad relationship because you "love" your partner will destroy your soul. You need to make a decision and here is how to do it. To determine your fate may be simpler than what you think. To make your decision about whether to stay or leave the relationship you are not content with, you need only follow these basic steps to determine what you should do.

Firstly, ask yourself : if I did not love my partner so much and my partner was a stranger, would I put up with the conduct of my partner.

Secondly, if your answer to 1. is "No", ask yourself whether a reasonable person who did not possess love for your partner, would tolerate the actions of your partner with a view to commence a relationship.

Thirdly, if the answer to 2. is also "No" then you have made an intellectual decision about your relationship, divorced from the confusion being in love brings, and your intellect tells you that it is time to move on.

To leave a partner is not easy and it is emotionally upsetting in the extreme. However the prospects of opening the door to sharing your love with someone else who is deserving of your love and who will return that love with respect and integrity are well worth the effort. Even being single is a better place to be in than assigning your love to the undeserving.

Tags & Keywords : love, partner abusive, help with love, marriage, divorce, separation, finding happiness, leaving your partner